The real challenge in estate planning is not the technical and financial part.  According to Roy Williams at The Williams Group, only 2 to 3 percent of failed estate transfers were caused by professional incompetence on the part of advisors, accountants, and attorneys.  The major cause of failure is the lack of preparing the heirs for assuming the responsibilities and benefits of wealth.
Why is that?
The results of interviews with 3,250 families showed the primary cause of failing to prepare heirs is a breakdown of trust and communication within the family.  “Parents were routinely decisive in dealing with business matters or in selecting their professional advisors.  But when it came to inviting their heirs to become involved in the preparation of wills trusts etc. they were very reluctant.  Parents feared that heir awareness of the estate parameters might diminish their children’s motivation and distort their values.”  The result?  This desire to protect only led to mistrust which led to less communication which finally resulted in a “cordial hypocrisy” among family members agreeing to not bring up the subject.
In fact, the study identified the top six concerns of parents that in turn proved to be obstacles to communication and trust.
65%  Too much emphasis on material things
55%  Naïve about the value of money
52%  Spend beyond their means
50%  Initiative could be ruined by affluence
49%  Won’t do as well financially
42%  Hard time taking financial responsibility
 
By not having adult to adult conversations and building trust the parents spend far too much money on professionals and assuring themselves that the trusts are even more restrictive and focused on managing the finances of the heirs. The outcome: less prepared heirs more likely to fail in their future responsibilities.
Fortunately, there are ways to break the pattern and I would encourage you to read the full article for how to do that.