“Listen carefully to what I am saying – and be wary of the shrewd advice that tells you how to get ahead in the world on your own.  Giving, not getting, is the way.  Generosity begets generosity.  Stinginess impoverishes.”  Mark 4:24-25

The basis for giving groups is two fold:  First, a genuine desire to become a joyful giver and, second, an openness to doing that not alone but as a part of a group.  If the motivation is to merely leverage then it will not work.  If the motivation is to control those with whom you give or those who receive then it will not work.  It will work and be blessed to the extent that each person in the group comes to believe that “generosity begets generosity” and the joy of giving is contagious in a community.  In the following ten steps we have tried to set out a simple process for doing just that.  We will refine and change them as needed and expect you to do the same but this is what has worked for us so far.

1. Two couples meet and decide who to invite to be a part of the group. True, one couple could do this on their own but we have found that two couples have a wider range of friends and will continue to encourage each other during the life of the group.  There is no magic number for the size of the group but ten couples (20 people) gives you enough people in case some cannot make all the meetings.  As well, ten couples will generate more than enough ideas for the giving of the group.  Finally, ten couples will give your group enough initial money to generate some excitement.  While it is good to have some diversity in the group, it is important that a good number of the people have something in common such as church, neighborhood, schools or clubs.  It makes for a quicker start in developing trust and communication.  I have included a letter that was sent to each of the couples in our first group.

2. The contribution from each couple needs to be the same. That gives everyone equal standing in the group.  The amount is flexible but we found that $500 for young professionals is not a problem.  You may find that $1,000 in your community works just as well.  We would suggest not going below $500 unless you want to start giving groups for very young couples.  The amount of contribution should not be a burden but it should be enough to take seriously.

3. Invite the couples to the first meeting in a home or other relaxed and comfortable atmosphere. Provide some light snacks but not a dinner.  It should be pleasant and informal.  This is not a business meeting or a committee meeting but an opportunity to present the basic idea of the giving groups and allow people to meet each other.  We found 7:30 – 9:00 on Sunday evening works for us.  The idea of the giving group can be presented by one or two people and allow plenty of time for questions.  People will want to know what kinds of organizations qualify for gifts from the group; who will hold the money while they decide where to give; the process for deciding; the identity of the people making the matching gifts; and other questions. Some of these can be anticipated and some must be decided by the group itself.  I have included an excellent article (“Getting Together to Give”) that will help you with some of these.  If everyone seems positive and likely to be a part of the initial group then you may want to talk about a defined mission or purpose for your group.  On the other hand, you may decide that your group wants to be more open ended than that.  If possible, get a commitment from as many as possible and set the time for the next meeting.  The next meeting should be about 2-3 months after the first to allow people time to look for giving opportunities to present to the group.

4. Establish a place to “bank” the money and give people their tax-deduction for the gift. Our foundation, The Fourth Partner Foundation, has agreed to serve this role in our community.  Checks are made payable to the Foundation and we set up an account for disbursing the money when the group decides on a gift.  A community foundation is another vehicle.  You may even find a local non-profit that would serve this purpose.  It is important that your “bank” be credible in the community as you are asking people to trust that organization to administer the fund.

5. If you choose to recruit individuals or foundations to “match” the giving this is the time to talk with them. Typically, older givers prefer to see the names of the couples who have committed to the group rather than giving money to a concept.  It’s just the nature of a particular generation.  As well, they often do not understand the attraction of people giving in groups since their giving, typically, has been very private and done with only their wife or accountant knowing.  I have included a letter I wrote to about twenty people to explain the idea and their role in it.  You may choose another way or decide to find one person to match the entire amount of the group.  I will say that having a group of matchers is more appealing to the giving group and in time I think it will actually encourage some of the matchers to consider being a part of a giving group or starting another matching group themselves.

6. Send a letter to everyone in the group with a list of who is going to be a part of the group and, if appropriate, the names of the matchers. As well, remind them about the next meeting and encourage them to be looking for giving opportunities.  Be sure to remind them of the time and place of the next meeting.  It probably works best to have the second meeting at the same place to eliminate as much confusion as possible.  Again, it should be informal.  If possible, send out a reminder and update card two weeks before the second meeting.  People forget!

7. The nature of the second meeting will depend on the ground rules you establish and whether or not you have decided the group should give the money as quickly as possible or give the money in increments to allow for more interaction as a group. If you decide to give the money quickly then the second meeting will allow the group to present their ideas, discuss and decide which organizations should receive the money.  You may want to write several checks or just one or two checks.  You may want to give the entire amount at this second meeting or give part now and then meet again to give the balance.  Your group may decide to continue meeting and want to put even more money into the fund.  It is at this point that you need to be discerning and flexible.  Part of the appeal of the giving groups for most participants is the interaction with others and not just the amount of money that is given.  Others are attracted by the idea of leveraging their giving and are not as interested in the interaction.  The chemistry will be different in each group.  However, this second meeting serves as an opportunity to poll the group and set the direction. Because of the importance of the group itself deciding we would suggest you not invite the matchers to this second meeting.  If the decision is made to meet again then set the next meeting date.

8. After the group has made a decision about their giving, instruct the “bank” to send the checks to the appropriate organization(s). You may want to write a letter that will go with the check from the group.  You may want the gift to be anonymous.  The group can decide on a case by case basis if they want.

9. Communicate with the matchers about the decision of the group and, if appropriate, invite them to join the group for the next meeting. The more you can tell them about the recipients and the reasons for giving the better.  It encourages them to think of themselves as a part of the process and not isolated donors.  They very much want to feel a part.  As well, keeping them informed serves as a very low-key accountability device for the group.

10. At the third meeting take the time to celebrate and talk about the gifts made by the group. Members may have stories to tell about responses to the gifts or may want to talk about their own feelings about this experience as it will likely be new for all of them. As well, it will give the matchers a sense of why it is important for them to continue in their role.  This meeting may be the last meeting for the group.  If that is the case then they may want to talk about forming new groups with other friends.  That is perfectly fine.  Some of this first group may decide to continue as the “original” group and recruit new couples to bring the group back to ten.  The matchers will have ideas and options as well.  Even though it is important that the meeting not consume too much time, it is good to allow everyone to be a part of this discussion.  There is no “right” outcome at this point.  If you do decide to continue meeting then it is important to tell your “bank” what you are going to do.  If new groups form then they need to either find a new “bank” or ask the existing one to work with them.  We are committed to working with a maximum of 25 giving groups at any one time.

We are very interested in hearing about your progress and experiences with giving groups.  As well, others would like to learn from you so please stay in touch with us.  We may refer others to you once you are up and running.

Other resources: 

We would strongly suggest you contact The Shefa Fund and request a copy of “Building Community, Creating Justice:  A Guide for Organizing Tzedakah Collectives”.  This is a terrific guide for the “nuts and bolts” work of giving groups.  Collaborative giving has a rich tradition in Judaism and they have worked out many superb models.  This 43 page booklet addresses all the basic issues of giving groups and is full of practical advice. To order, send $10 to the Shefa Fund, 7318 Germantown Avenue, Philadelphia, PA 19119 or call (215)247-9704.